The Lent and Easter Seasons of Marriage
It's just been one of those weeks. Well, actually it's just been one of those months. I have been dealing with a colitis flare up which led to being on steroids, which means I feel like a crazy person, which means my husband has to deal with a crazy person. Oh yeah, and then there is doing all this while trying to parent a toddler and a preschooler. A toddler who keeps waking up in the night crying for no reason that we understand. Under these circumstances, one can understand why things in our marriage this past week have been a little awkward and a lot tense. Communication when we are both emotionally compromised has been a real bust.
My incredible husband is the sweetest and most patient man I have ever known. This is one of the main reasons I married him. He is a true gem. We have a fantastic relationship and it's something I am ever so proud of. I adore him and our deep conversations that are never ending. However, life happens and it doesn't mean that we don't have our seasons of fails and hardships.
So there we are last night about to fall asleep which is the world's worst timing to bring up something that you are upset about by the way...(I am really good at this fail.) It led to one of those stupid repeat yourself like a broken-record arguments headed nowhere but to disaster. It ended in me totally losing it and just crying. Mr. Sweetest Husband in the World knew to just drop everything in that moment and simply held me while whispering, "It's all going to OK."
Once I stopped being angry and curled into a ball of brokenness, he said "I don't even care anymore what we are arguing about, I just want you to be OK." Now, we usually work through a fight until we come to some type of resolve on how to do life better together. This time was different. This time, we just decided to drop everything. We decided not to talk about what was troubling us anymore, and to just completely let it go. THIS IS SO HARD FOR ME! I want to process, I want to fix, I want to work through all the nitty gritty feelings and express everything! But this time I knew we had no emotional or physical energy for any of that. I was OK with completely letting go. No more bringing up crap that happened this month. We are going to start new! It felt freeing and hopeful. I felt peace restored in our relationship again.
I lay there thinking about the idea of starting fresh and I realized how beautiful the timing of it all was for Holy week. I tend to use the season of Lent as a time to process the hard messy stuff of life. It's a season to reflect on what's going wrong, what needs to go better, and how much we need God. Lent is a time to be refined which leaves us feeling uncomfortable exposing our sin. It's a time I often find myself wrestling with God. It is a time to be endured in order to truly grow spiritually and as a human being. Going through Lent is what makes Easter so beautiful! Jesus Christ was buried taking with him every inch of our sin. Easter is about completely letting go and entering into freedom! We get to start over, 100% completely righteous!
Like Lent, there are seasons with my husband that are more about being refined as a couple as we sort
through our messy stuff. We usually learn more about each other during that time and are better for it. But GEEEEZ the process sucks sometimes! There's a time to process and a time to let go. There's a time to celebrate and rest in joy! Lent is just about over, and I am looking forward to letting go this Easter and starting over thanks to the incredible love of a risen Christ.
So there we are last night about to fall asleep which is the world's worst timing to bring up something that you are upset about by the way...(I am really good at this fail.) It led to one of those stupid repeat yourself like a broken-record arguments headed nowhere but to disaster. It ended in me totally losing it and just crying. Mr. Sweetest Husband in the World knew to just drop everything in that moment and simply held me while whispering, "It's all going to OK."
Once I stopped being angry and curled into a ball of brokenness, he said "I don't even care anymore what we are arguing about, I just want you to be OK." Now, we usually work through a fight until we come to some type of resolve on how to do life better together. This time was different. This time, we just decided to drop everything. We decided not to talk about what was troubling us anymore, and to just completely let it go. THIS IS SO HARD FOR ME! I want to process, I want to fix, I want to work through all the nitty gritty feelings and express everything! But this time I knew we had no emotional or physical energy for any of that. I was OK with completely letting go. No more bringing up crap that happened this month. We are going to start new! It felt freeing and hopeful. I felt peace restored in our relationship again.
I lay there thinking about the idea of starting fresh and I realized how beautiful the timing of it all was for Holy week. I tend to use the season of Lent as a time to process the hard messy stuff of life. It's a season to reflect on what's going wrong, what needs to go better, and how much we need God. Lent is a time to be refined which leaves us feeling uncomfortable exposing our sin. It's a time I often find myself wrestling with God. It is a time to be endured in order to truly grow spiritually and as a human being. Going through Lent is what makes Easter so beautiful! Jesus Christ was buried taking with him every inch of our sin. Easter is about completely letting go and entering into freedom! We get to start over, 100% completely righteous!
Like Lent, there are seasons with my husband that are more about being refined as a couple as we sort
through our messy stuff. We usually learn more about each other during that time and are better for it. But GEEEEZ the process sucks sometimes! There's a time to process and a time to let go. There's a time to celebrate and rest in joy! Lent is just about over, and I am looking forward to letting go this Easter and starting over thanks to the incredible love of a risen Christ.
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