Enough

I handed my baby boy over to his day care teacher and I ran out the door to get as much done as possible in the next five hours baby free! My mind was racing with a to do list. Gotta prioritize! What should I get done first?
On the way out the door for some random reason this hill caught my attention in the parking lot. There was nothing fancy about it but I noticed a trail going up it and I wondered where this trail went. I continued walking to my car like those old lady mall workers on a mission. No time for hiking today, I gotta stick to my schedule.

"Go up the hill." - Said some voice in my head.

"Can't! I need to utilize every minute possible! I will do it later." - Said my own voice in my head.

I couldn't stop myself from staring at the hill with one hand on the handle of my car door.

"Go up the hill. I want to tell you something." - Said THAT voice in my head.

Maybe if I go up this hill God will give me some answers to all the unknowns I have been frustrated with lately. So I decided to climb the hill and find out.

My mind still racing with my to-do list, I couldn't seem to clear my head and just listen to whatever God wanted to tell me. When I got to the top of the hill I thought maybe then God would speak to me. Instead all I could do was think of everything I have been frustrated with lately. God what are you doing? I wanted answers. I tried just sitting in silence, looking for answers in nature, and praying out loud.

"I am listening God! What do you want to say?"

Silence.

"I guess I am just completely crazy. I thought YOU were speaking to me so I climbed this stupid hill just to burn some extra calories. Well thanks for the work out God!"

Then I followed the path back down and noticed it twisted back into the woods. So I walked a little ways into the woods where there was this open clearing and I just let the sun hit my face. God didn't talk to me. Oh well. Maybe he wasn't calling me to climb the hill. It doesn't matter. I stopped caring. I just want to enjoy a few moments of peace. And that's when I heard Him.

"I love you. You are beautiful!" - Said THAT voice in my head

"That's it? I need direction. I need help!!! And that's all you wanted to tell me? " I snapped back. 

"Isn't that enough?" - Said THAT voice in my head

Later I remembered when God says He loves us it's so much more than a warm cozy feeling. 1 John 4:10 says, "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."  

 God gave us His life. That is enough. Even if He never answers another prayer for me again, He has done enough.





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